"A person is never as quiet or unrestrained as they seem. Or as good, as bad, as vulnerable, as strong, or as sweet. We are thickly layered, page by page, behind simple covers. And love - it is not the book itself, but the binding. It can either rip us apart or hold us together."
Dad did make it a double bummer yesterday. Yeah you know, post-father's day ego I suppose. Actually his ego is 24/7. MEN.
Anyway, tomorrow marks my second year with my dear and I seriously feel unorganized, unkempt and unprepared. Very Un-nish. Suddenly I feel as though my gifts are the most nonsensical stuff I could ever give my boyfriend (all of which at the moment I bought them I though Great Idea, Elyn!) Riiight. Now I look at the box with disdain. I still have quite a bit to go on the book. Which I now wonder what the hell possessed me into starting a photobook, knowing my creative capabilities are very much limited. And I'm afraid by the time I give him the cake it's already broken to crumbs, icing melted or worst still, EATEN. Haha! You never know what can happen, giving food to a pig like me.
No, but seriously. I've realised that I've spent so much on practically.. nothing much.
And I wish he hand't said what he said for now it makes me feel even smaller. Tiny, in fact.
Oh well. Nasi telah menjadi bubur. And even though I'm guessing he won't fancy them much, I will seriously kick him in the nuts if he chucks away my photobook cos dang, I put in effort making and printing the damn pics for about 3months. Funny how an ugly thing could cost me around $40.
But you know what? Ugly or not, I know I've put in effort and money into getting him this disastrous gifts and I know he was once very excited about his so called plan. And I'm just looking forward to spending time with him. Not just to mark 2 years, (cos if you think about it properly, it's nothing compared to a lifetime of love.) but I guess to celebrate memories and experiences that will last me a lifetime; and in hope of many, many more years of misunderstandings, arguements, lame inside jokes, corny songs, wiping of tears, warm hugs and love. =)
Ok now I'm feeling more optimism in me. 23rd, here I come!
X O X O; 11:27 am